You see dating's just a tool I use
to figure out that I don't love someone.
Heart is a clock but I just sleep through my alarm.
And now it seems I've finally found someone
but his heart belongs to someone else.
I can't stop the hand from turning with my arm.
So it's just another night I cannot sleep.
Just another flashing light I'm forced to see,
but at least I've tried. I've tried so hard to close my eyes
and sleep through my screams.
Now it seems I've lost myself.
What I want today might change as well.
Chasing my way out of Hell
with invisible tape on my damaged shell
and he really likes me too, I guess,
with all those nights we spent undressed.
Hope, to him, I'm not just someone else.
And we listened to the pain we shared
as we walked and talked in the cold night air
and I told him he was filling up a void.
I said "Holes they can dig deeply, yes,
they can eat you up inside your chest so
listen close while I digest and
tell you why my eyes are red.
It was just another sign I could not see.
It was just the final time she made me bleed
and she saw me cry when I was tired of all her lies,
then she turned from me."
Now the stress shows through my face
with more tension in my living space.
Finally come face to face
with the man I thought would scare me away
but we stayed up all night like before.
Each story told made me think more
that I hope that he will trust in me someday
cuz I'm not just gonna lie right to his face
so I hope that I don't make the same mistakes
But I'll try
something for myself
without someone to guide my mind
but I'll still deny
that I'd be happier if I kept my mind off "why"
It was just another mask I've come to be.
It was just another insecurity
but at least I've tried. You can't deny that I've tried
to see objectively.
from 10 Years,
released September 28, 2020
Music and Lyrics written by Adam Johnston
Produced by Adam Johnston
Vocals, Acoustic Guitar, Drums, Bass, Piano, Cello, Synth: Adam Johnston
Violin: Ned Wilkinson, Adam Johnston